Monthly Archives: January 2014

The D’Souza indictment: a heaping helping of schadenfreude

Conservative Author Dinesh D’Souza Charged With Campaign Finance Fraud.

Liberals of my age (53) have been listening to this guy make an ass of himself in the name of conservatism since we were all in college — though thank God not the same one — at the same time.  As a founder of the Dartmouth Review, his idea of a good time was to do courageous things like support apartheid, defend the school’s use of a native American mascot, and publish an article in faux “ebonics” to make fun of affirmative action.

This led to a predictable career on the conservative gravy train/welfare line, working for the Heritage Foundation and American Enterprise Institute, and publishing an absurdly inflammatory anti-Obama screed.  From Wikipedia, as I had no idea just how out there he had become, we learn that in his book The Enemy at Home: The Cultural Left and Its Responsibility for 9/11, he wrote that:

The cultural left in this country is responsible for causing 9/11 … the cultural left and its allies in Congress, the media, Hollywood, the non-profit sector and the universities are the primary cause of the volcano of anger toward America that is erupting from the Islamic world.

But my favs are quotes like this:

In Letters to a Young Conservative, written as an introduction to conservative ideas for youth, D’Souza argues that it is a blend of classical liberalism and ancient virtue, in particular, “the belief that there are moral standards in the universe and that living up to them is the best way to have a full and happy life.”

Because in the article where Talking Points Memo reports D’Souza’s indictment, we also learn this:

Federal Election Commission records show D’Souza, his one-time wife and a woman he once described as his fiancee all donated to Long’s campaign. (In October 2012, D’Souza said he and his wife filed for divorce after he admitted he was dating the other woman.)

Living up to those universal moral standards, are we?

I was also strangely gratified to learn that his first wife was named “Dixie.”  Seriously, if you wrote a novel about an arrogant college conservative, your editor would not let you name his wife “Dixie.”

Phoenix, day 1

When we left Denver, it was 1 degree at the end of the jetway; when we landed in Phoenix it was 75.  Ahhhhhhhh.  Although we had great plans to spend the afternoon on a photo walk/roll through the streets of Phoenix, we spent the first half waiting for the van rental company to get its act together, checked in to the hotel, walked half a block, found a bar with outdoor seating in the sun, and ixnayed all further plans.  In celebration of the warm weather, I enjoyed an excellent HefeWeizen from the local San Tan brewery, though I was puzzled by their slogan:

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

What else would you do with it?

I want to live somewhere where I need this item.

The Container Store > PerfectCurve® Flip-Flop Rack.

I’m trying out an add-on called “Press This” which lets me send a webpage directly to WordPress.  Of course, I’m perusing The Container Store’s site because I should be writing a brief.  Still — what a wonderful aspirational product.  Just think of the sort of place where you’d need storage for your eight different styles of flip flop.

The Man-Haters at Fox News

Brit Hume and Bill O’Reilly Think America’s Too ‘Feminized’ to Appreciate Chris Christie.”  Hume:

I have to say that in this sort of feminized atmosphere in which we exist today, guys who are masculine and muscular like that in their private conduct and are kind of old-fashioned tough guys run some risks.

This only works if “masculine” means “childish, lying, grudge-carrying asshole” and “feminized” means “acting like a decent, grown-up human being.”  Given what we know about Christie’s behavior, Hume’s declaration can only be read as an insult to men, something I would not have thought I’d hear at Fox News.

There Never Was a Golden Age

I keep meaning to write a long, interconnected, analytical post about how annoyed I get with the concept that Times Are Bad Now, Not Like the Olden Days.  My theory is that the Olden Days were good and bad in many and varying ways, just as our present times are good and bad in many and varying ways, and all of this for the simple reason that we’re talking about the history of human beings, a notoriously brilliant, stupid, open-minded, prejudiced, generous, stubborn, violent, peaceful, and above all self-centered species.

But another signal trait of our species is procrastination — think any other species would have survived, evolutionarily speaking, if they procrastinated like we do?  “I’ll worry about gathering acorns later.”  etc. — so of course I have never gotten around to writing that definitive, all-encompassing psycho-history-of-the-human-race post.  So I thought I’d start a new category — #thereneverwasagoldenage — and just add examples as I find them.

Today’s example:  there never was a golden age of lawyerly civility.  Every time some lawyer does something buttheaded these days, you hear the unison tsking of mainstream tongues about how it didn’t used to be like that, when we could settle a case over a G&T at the club instead of having to fight about depositions and interrogatories and (big, privileged, sigh) metadata.  Herewith, an example of legal argumentation in the good ol’ days of mid-1960s Mississippi.  First, the background of the case:

[P]etitioners and other Negro and white Episcopal clergymen undertook a ‘prayer pilgrimage’ in 1961 from New Orleans to Detroit. The purpose of the pilgrimage was to visit church institutions and other places in the North and South to promote racial equality and integration, and, finally, to report to a church convention in Detroit. Letters from the leader of the group to its members indicate that the clergymen intended from the beginning to go to Jackson and attempt to use segregated facilities at the bus terminal there, and that they fully expected to be arrested for doing so. The group made plans based on the assumption that they would be arrested if they attempted peacefully to exercise their right as interstate travelers to use the waiting rooms and other facilities at the bus terminal, and the letters discussed arrangements for bail and other matters relevant to arrests.

Pierson v. Ray, 386 U.S. 547, 552 (1967).  The point of the case is that the clergymen had standing to challenge segregation despite the fact that they did so knowing they were going to be arrested.  But here is an example of just how civil it was in court in the olden days:

the Court of Appeals reversed and remanded for a new trial on the . . . claim against the police officers because defense counsel had been allowed to cross-examine the ministers on various irrelevant and prejudicial matters, particularly including an alleged convergence of their views on racial justice with those of the Communist Party.

Id. at 551.  Something (one small example among many) to think about next time some old fart lawyer (in whose ranks I now count myself) tries to explain how much better it used to be.

PhotoAbility.Net!

There is finally a stock photography site full of real, active, did I mention real? people with disabilitiesPhotoAbility.net has apparently been up and running for a couple of years; I just discovered it because its founder, Deborah Davis, was featured as New Mobility’s Person of the Year.

We first used stock photography in a monumentally misguided* attempt to settle a case by presenting the defendant with examples of how people with disabilities could be part of its advertising and outreach.  Seeking stock photographs, we ran searches like “wheelchair,” “disabled” and of course “handicapped” in the various mainstream stock photography sites.  What we found were (1) hospital and medical images; and (2) essentially fake images in which obviously non-disabled people had seated themselves in crappy gray-vinyl hospital wheelchairs to undertake random daily tasks.

When we finally found a couple of images that seemed genuine, we bought them, and then discovered such images were so rare, we saw the same folks all over the damn place.  I’m guessing, for example, if you read any sort of disability-oriented publication, you’ve encountered these photogenic folks:

{Image: Photo of boy and man. Both are African-American. The man is on the right, sitting in a manual wheelchair, spinning a basketball on his finger. The boy stands to his side, watching the basketball and holding up one finger as if to imitate the man.}

{Image: a woman and girl, both white, both blond. The girl is in a manual wheelchair. The woman hugs her from behind.}

We had such little luck finding real images that we solicited some from photogenic friends doing photogenic things with photogenic kids, and then took one or two ourselves.  This, for example, is our friend Julie, her two older daughters, and our dog in our backyard.  Think PhotoAbility would be interested?

{Image:  A blond woman (sitting in a manual wheelchair) and two blond girls playing with a golden retriever dog under a tree in a fenced yard.  One girl, perhaps two years old, sits in her mother's lap.  The other girl, perhaps 6 years old, holds a toy out to the dog.}

We continue to use stock images on our website and in educational materials, so I’m very excited to learn about stock photography with gen-u-ine pwds doing genuinely cool stuff.  Also that PhotoAbility is part of a network of great sites at PushLiving.com about inclusive travel, lifestyle, design, etc.  Check them out!

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* Part of a hilariously grandiose settlement attempt suggested by new and (as it turned out) temporary co-counsel.  We appeared at a meeting with the defendant’s general counsel and her posse with a bunch of spiral-bound glossy brochures featuring our purchased and home-made stock images and a bunch of powerpoint verbiage about how wonderful and inclusive access was and how it would enhance their image, etc. etc., and of course they could not possibly have cared less.  They wanted to know what it would cost, thanks for making the trip, goodbye.  Luckily, since it was early in our practice, our dear, wonderful copy people “forgot” to charge us for the glossy brochures and spiral binding.  The case finally settled — three general counsels and two outside counsels later.  So it goes.

Piano Bar

Today’s aspirational to do list:

1. Draft amicus brief.

Today’s actual to do/done list:

  1. Facebook.
  2. Words with Friends.*
  3. Download last night’s photos.
  4. Play with last night’s photos.
  5. Play with the dog in the snow.
  6. Play with the camera in the snow.
  7. Play with today’s photos.
  8. Blog about all of the above.
  9. [possibly, eventually] Draft amicus brief.

As for the title of the post:  Tried a new place for dinner last night – the Black Crown.  It’s in an old house on S. Broadway, and pretty darn accessible for an old house, though the couple of accommodations we requested (table; Kevin’s drink poured into the accessible cup he carries with him) generally required several stages of blank stares (hereinafter, for reasons that made sense last night, the “Roquefort”), bureaucratic explanations that it could not be done, further gentle prodding by us, followed by acquiescence.  But this pattern continued through our request for a side order of bread, so they may just be a generally inflexible bunch.

All that said, the ambiance is wonderful.  Ensconced in décor that can only be described as “Grandma’s House,”** you dine on small plates accompanied by live piano music.

{Image:  photo.  in the left foreground, the back of a brocade (flowered) chair.  right foreground: the back of the head of an older gentleman with a short haircut and a hat.  To the right in the background, a Christmas tree with lights.  In the center, an older man in a beret playing the piano.}

I thought the back of the guy’s head added to the ambiance.

{Image:  close up of a glass of dark beer.  christmas tree with lights in the right background.}

The art on the walls was wonderful.

{Image: painting of a woman seated in a chair, possibly signaling for a waiter.  she wears a stylish hat and a dress.  the painting is in muted colors of browns and beiges. she has a cat on her lap.}

The small plates were terrific, though not necessarily terrific enough to justify the total bill.

Woke up to snow that is supposed to continue through the day.  Not much compared with what our friends back East are getting, though.

{Image:  two wooden slatted patio chairs with about a half-inch of snow.}

{Image:  close up of the slats on a metal bench covered with about a half-inch of snow.}

Onward to the amicus brief.  No! Wait!  I need to marinate steak for beef jerky first!  And do laundry!  And… I’m sure there’s something else that requires puttering.

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* Just logged back on after a year or so.  I created an account a while back to play with my niece and nephew, but after having my ass handed to me by a couple of kids, gracefully — ok, petulantly — retired from the game.

** If, technically speaking, your Grandma had, in addition to comfy brocade sofas and knick-knacks in glass cases, a life-sized, anatomically-correct statue of the David.

Which beatitude was that?

You know, the one that said that rich dudes who withhold their religious-oriented charitable donations to bribe the previously-infallible pope to get him to stop hurting rich people’s feelings will inherit the earth?

Via Talking Points Memo:

{Image:  two photographs side by side, one of an older, balding man in a suit speaking into a microphone; the other of Pope Francis, in a white robe and yarmulke.  Both photos show the respective men from the mid-torso up.  The headline above the photos reads "Billionaire Home Depot Founder Says Pope Francis Is Alienating The Rich."}

Billionaire Home Depot founder Ken Langone has a warning for Pope Francis.

A major Republican donor, Langone told CNBC in a story published online Monday that wealthy people such as himself might stop giving to charity if the Pope continues to make statements criticizing capitalism and income inequality.

Guess the eye of the needle was larger than originally thought.

New year random photo dump

My 2014 New Year’s resolution is to blog more.  I was inspired by my cousin’s resolution to cancel her gym membership and my brother’s resolution to drink more.  Why should resolutions be designed to bum you out?  Start the year right with a resolution that will make you happy!  So I’m resolving to blog more, play with the dog(s)* more, and eat more pasta.  That first one may increase the down-scrolling and notification-deleting burden on you, my five loyal readers, but just think of it as additional exercise for your typing fingers!

In a move that is essentially burning through a month’s worth of good resolution-keeping material on the first day of 2014, herewith a photo dump from the back half of 2013, that is, random cellphone photos that entertain me without actually being worthy of an entire blog post.

From our favorite Denver deli, The Bagel Deli:  cheesy jalapeño knishes.  Just another reason I love the west!

{Image:  photo of handwritten sign advertising "Knishes!!! Cheesy Jalapeno."}

More Denver/Jewish humor:

{Image:  lighted sign on the side of a bar reading "Drink Gin & Tonikah/Happy Hanukkah."  Above that sign is a vertical sign showing that the bar is The Hornet.}

Behind the bar at Cholon which, besides having scary creatures in wine bottles, has amazing small plates like duck spring rolls.

{Image:  a wine bottle with yellow-colored roots and a snake inside.}

Green tea chai latte fail:

{Image:  overhead view of cup filled with slightly foamy green liquid.}

Saguaro explaining that it’s time to stop vegging in front of the computer and start throwing the tennis ball.

{Image:  photo of laptop keyboard.   In the upper right hand corner is a tennis ball and just to the right of that, a dog's nose.}

A little light reading on my way to my cousin’s bridal shower in Portland, Maine.

{Image:  photo of newspaper headline, "Shark off Boothbay likely a great white, B1."}

When shopping for yard clean-up, I had to admire the attention to detail in the browser tab icon for Pet Scoop:

{Image: long horizontal clip from the tabs that appear at the top of an internet browser indicating the open tabs. On the left, the tab contains the Google logo of a bright red M, and reads "Inbox - amyfrobertson." On the right, the tab contains an icon resembling a document and reads "Untitled document." In the middle, the tab reads, "Denver Pooper Scoop" and includes a logo resembling a pile of dog poop.}

I know on some level I should be offended by this, but I found myself more amused, and admiring the entrepreneurial spirit.

{Image:  signage from front of the Denver strip club called "Shotgun Willie's."  The sign reads, "Topless Gift Wrapping Thurs & Fri."  The Shotgun Willie's logo above the sign is an oversized shotgun, arcing downward.}

We were very sad to say goodbye to our favorite tapas joint, Ondo’s, where we had a typically amazing meal last night, its last night before closing.  Really hoping the owners will find a good space and reopen elsewhere.

{Image:  painted mural with a waiter carrying a tray with a bottle, viewed from the back, and a store front with the logo "Ondo's"}

Then we closed out the year in typical party-animal fashion:

{Image:  a few of a sofa, dog and television from the perspective of the person stretched out in the sofa.  So along the left side, legs in sweatpants ending in feet in striped socks.  Next to the legs a golden retriever; in the background, a tv showing a hockey game.}

Happy New Year to all and onward to 2014!

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*New puppy coming later this month!  Will make the “more blogging” resolution really easy!